Sign my Guestbook

Thursday, December 07, 2006

Animal Christmas Cheer


How to cats greet each other at Christmas?
"A furry merry Christmas & Happy mew year!"

What do you call a cat on a beach at Christmas?
Sandy Claws!

Why couldn't the cat work out how to use her new video?
She kept pressing paws!

Woman: Excuse me, do you have a kitten for my little girl?
Assistant: Sorry, madam, we don't do swaps.

Which animal should you not play cards with?
A cheetah!


What kind of bird can write?
A PENguin!

Where do penguins go to dance?
At the snowball

What do baby penguins sing when their father brings fish home?
Freeze a jolly good fellow

polar bears

Where do polar bears go to vote?
At the North Poll

How do you start a polar-bear race?
Say 'Ready! Teddy! Go!'

What's white, furry and smells of mint?
A polo bear

What do polar bears eat for lunch?
Ice burgers

What are polar bears' favourite dessert?
Baked Alaska


What do sheep say to Santa?
Seasons bleatings!

How do sheep greet each other at Christmas?
Merry Christmas to ewe!

How do Mexican sheep say Merry Christmas?
Fleece Navidad!

What is a sheep’s Christmas carol
We wish ewe a Merry Christmas


Mum, Can I have a dog for Christmas ?
No you can have turkey like everyone else !

What did the dog get for Christmas?
A mobile bone!

What do you do if your dog has ticks?
Don't wind him up!


Who is never hungry at Christmas ?
The turkey - he's always stuffed !

What do vampires put on their turkey at Christmas ?
Grave-y !

Why was the Turkey in the pop group?
Because he was the only one with drum-sticks!

This turkey's disgusting!
Well, you asked for a foul roast!

How did the chickens dance at the Christmas party ?
Chick to chick !

Why did the chicken cross the football pitch?
Because the referee whistled for a fowl!

And as the reindeer say before they tell you jokes ....
These jokes will sleigh you!

Did Rudolph go to a regular school?
No, he was "elf"-taught!

How does Rudolph know when Christmas is coming?
He looks at his calen-"deer"!

What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees?

Which of Santa's reindeer has bad manners?

Why is Prancer always wet?
Because he's a "rain"-deer!

A rabbit's favourite Christmas song?
'Lettuce with a gladsome mind'

What did the police do when the hares escaped from the zoo?
They combed the area!

What drink do frogs like best?


Anonymous said...

Hahahahaha! Fleece Navidad, Fleece Navidad as sung by Jose Fleece-iano!

Bussie Kissies

Anonymous said...

Hahahahaha! Fleece Navidad, Fleece Navidad as sung by Jose Fleece-iano!

Bussie Kissies

Fu Fu said...

That is very clever and cute of you Scuba. ;)

~ fufu

Anonymous said...

Hahahahaha! Fleece Navidad, Fleece Navidad as sung by Jose Fleece-iano!

Bussie Kissies

Rafv said...

hehe. Mobile bone.. You smart boy, Scuba. You can come up so many these. I underestimated you, zzz zzz lander brother. :)


Joe Stains said...

We got your card, thank you so much!

Sam Iam said...

Excellent seasonal flavor!woof-woof
Lot's of Lick's

Anonymous said...

Tee hee! Great jokes Scuba! Thank you for the Christmas card too!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Years,


Opy - the Original GruffPuppy said...

Tee Hee - there are some good funnies in there :-)

Thanks for the card Scuba - it was lovely, and a very handsome picture too !


Sam Iam said...

It came in the mail today .YOUR CARD. What a handsome picture of you .Your sooo squeezable.My mom is dribbling over you .Thank you ,Happy Holidays .woof-woof

Lot's of Lick's

Anonymous said...

heheheh. What great jokes.
We got your card. At first I thought your scarf was a cape, and it was a picture of Scuba, the SuperElf! Very cute picture.